Wander

There's no rewind, no going back. So, I take up my burden and I carry forth; take with me the hopes of a better tomorrow. I cannot take back the mistakes I’ve made. My greatest hope is to learn from them, and to gain forgiveness from those I have hurt with my cruel words and thoughtless ways. I know if I asked, you would take my hand and go forth with me, but this journey is mine alone.

This is something I must do alone. I cannot hope to find myself if guided along by another. Too long, I’ve found excuses and reasons to stay in the rut I’ve dug for myself, making a comfortable home of patterns that were easier to follow than break free from.

We could journey, side by side, to be there to catch the other when they stumble, but I know that our paths are meant to merely intertwine and meander along from time to time, before parting again, leaving me empty and scared, my footing slow and unsure as I again teach myself how to go forth without you.

This is not good bye forever, my dear, but merely a good bye for now.